Just for Women Wednesdays: A Woman's Tone of Voice

A Woman's Tone of Voice

 

(Image is from istockphoto.com)

 

A Real Life Tone of Voice Story 

Has there ever been a time when the tone of your voice hurt another woman's feelings? I remember a time when I snapped at a friend of mine. I didn't mean to. In fact, most times I am able to maintain my composure. Not this particular time. This time I LOST it.  My tone of my voice sounded like a crocodile biting off the head of it's prey. SNAP.  UGHHHHH!!!! "Did I do that?" I said to myself. "Oh, yes, I did." As I watched the tears swell up in her eyes, it was crystal clear I had hurt her heart. If my heart had been a balloon, it would have deflated at that very moment. I felt so awful about my actions toward a sweet friend. I never set out to cause her harm. How could I praise Jesus one day and the next day hurt a fellow sister in Christ?

 

Getting to the Root of Your Tone

Reactions are real. They come and go. As a wife, mother, friend, co-worker, fellow church member, we are always projecting some type of tone: cheerful, encouraging, testy, snappy, discouraged, snide, angry. We will mess up with our responses.  But we don't have to let our emotions get the best of us and everyone around us. We need to continually keep our tone in check. How do we do that?

 

Getting to the root of the tone of your voice can help you walk in freedom. In my case, when I reflected on my snappy tone of voice, I was able to trace its origin back to my hurried state. I was late. I felt like I let everybody down. I was disappointed in myself. As a person who tries to be dependable, I was undependable that day. On the drive over to my friends house, I mentally had already persecuted myself about being late and in a hurry which in turn caused me to be very tense. The moment I stepped out of the car, my inner frustration was obvious through my tone of voice and facial expressions. When my friend told me to relax, I lost it. I threw self-control out the window.

 

It's important to sit down and take an inventory of your vocal tonal patterns. Some of the hardest times for women to keep a check on their tone is when they feel unappreciated, hurt, forgotten, hurried, frustrated, late, left out, or betrayed. Those feelings fester in the heart and then come bubbling up in the tone of voice she projects toward others. Tone of voice can always be traced back to one of these inner feelings.

 

The Bible says: 

"Let the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O LORD, my rock and my redeemer"

(Psalm 19:14).

 

 

Three Ways to Reel In Your Tone of Voice

1. Don't beat Yourself Up-

We all mess up. Confess it to the LORD and quickly ask forgiveness from that person. Make right the relationship if at all possible.

 

2. Get to the Root -  Ask yourself, "Why is this tone coming out of my mouth at this moment?" Is there a life circumstance or other underlying cause bothering me?

 

3. Practice A New Way of Responding-  Learn from your mistakes. If you know your hot buttons, then you can be on guard to not give in to them and react in an unkind way. The more you are able to think ahead of the possibilities of changing your tone of voice, the better you'll be at not hiding beneath the frustrations of life through the tone of your voice. Practice in the car, at home, while you cook. Try to think of a new way to respond. 

 

You Can Change

Has someone recently told you that your tone of voice was hurtful? Asked you what was the matter? Asked you if you were OK? It's probably your tone of voice that is signaling to them to ask the question.Take their question with a teachable heart and get to the root of your tone. Examine it and see if it connects to your life circumstances or unchecked inner feelings.Why is this important? Because we are a witness of the LORD to others. May we always, always, always let our aim be for the tone of our words to please the LORD and be "acceptable" in His sight.

 

What do you think about this post today? Is it helpful?

Praying Like David

This is a new blog series that focuses solely on prayer.

Our prayers at times are quite dry because we say the same things over and over again. We don't use scripture to fuel our prayer lives. God gave us HIS Word to be prayed and meditated over. I constantly stand in awe of how David talked to God. Do you? His intimacy towards the LORD astounds me at times. It's so tender, yet so conversational. Reading his prayers and praying them back to God has ignited my prayer life.

David poured his heart out to God and recalled the greatness and goodness of God. It's in recalling God's greatness that he would find himself comforted and closer to the LORD. Isn't that what prayer is supposed to do? Draw us closer to intimacy with our LORD?

Today's prayer comes from Psalm 5:1-3 (The Message)

" Listen, GOD! Please pay attention! Can you make sense of these ramblings, my groans and cries? King-God, I need your help. Every morning you'll hear me at it again. Every morning I lay out the pieces of my life on your altar and watch for fire to descend."

1. Notice the heart of David and his desperateness to be heard.
2. How did David address God?
3. When was the last time you laid out the pieces of your life before the LORD and let Him make sense of your groans and cries?

Stop and make time to come boldly and honestly before God. Address Him as King of your life and frustrations. Ask Him to help you make sense of the current things going on in your life. He will.

Manna Monday- Are You a Bored Church Member?

Are You A Bored Church Member?

You float in late to church.
You forget your Bible.
You are always excusing your apathy, lateness or lack of participation in church to yourself.
You attend church at least two times out of the month because you are so busy on weekends or you just can't get up for whatever reason on Sunday mornings.
You want to serve somewhere but you don't feel equipped. You think other people are much more qualified.
You sing some of the worship songs, but not really.
You don't feel connected to others in your small group and think, "I wonder if I should leave and find another small group?" Truth is, have you even reached out to the people in your small group by greeting them or calling them?
Your mind wanders during the pastor's sermon and you think, "what am I going to do this afternoon? Where should we go for lunch?"

Church seems more of a chore or "to do list" than a joy and passion.

If this is you, you're a bored church member. Don't fret about it. Don't condemn yourself. Do something different. Commit to the LORD and not to people. Decide to get involved in serving others than waiting for others to serve you. This is the greatest way to ignite the passion of purpose in a believers heart away from boredom and apathy.

 Six Ways to Move From Boredom To Purpose

Here's the vital truth.
Your church needs YOU. It really does. They need help-always. They need people who are open to welcoming others and loving on them.

Here's what Paul said, "...we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is EQUIPPED, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love" Ephesians 4:16.

Are you growing up in every way into Christ who is the head of the church?
God equips you. To believe otherwise is a lie.
Look what happens when everything in the body is working properly? (Ephesians 4:16)
The BODY GROWS!!!!

You have a very important part in building up the body of Christ.
The greatest passion you can ever know is the passion of serving God's people.
But sadly, many people miss it because they are so covered up by apathy, lies and boredom.

Dear sister, don't miss out on the greatest adventure you could ever imagine with God.
He has a purpose for you in serving your church.
Ask Him today what it is and just start somewhere.

People get bored. People get tired. People get discouraged. But don't let these excuses keep you from growing your relationship with the LORD and helping build up HIS Kingdom for eternity.

Go use your gift and get started on the greatest adventure you can ever imagine!!!!!
 

Free Art Friday Winner

Sorry ladies for the delay this am. My helper cut out with his daddy and is no where to be found!
Daddy has been gone all week long due to a meeting out of town, so I should have guessed the two of them would be hanging out early on this Saturday morning. To not linger any longer, I had to draw the name.

                                      Thanks to EVERYONE who entered Free Art Friday!!!!!

All the names in the bowl.

 

Here I go, since who knows when my son will come back with his daddy today.

                            YAY! Congrats Lisa! Message me on Joy Treasure Page and we will discuss the

   best way to get the artwork to you! 

 

Stay tuned! LOTS more art coming on the Joy Treasure blog this year!!!

Free Art Friday!!

Hey y'all! Free Art Friday is back! (Sorry for the delay, I had a sick child this am.)

Free Art Friday Entry Rules

1. Enter your first and last name in the comment box under this blog post. Facebook doesn't count. You must leave your name under this blog post. I have to make it fair for those who come to the blog and enter their name. (Smiles)

2. You may only enter your name once for the painting.

3. Entry time ends today Friday, February 1st at 4pm.

4. Winner's name will be written on a piece of paper and drawn from a bowl by my son and announced Saturday morning, February 2, 2013 on the blog before 9:30am.

5. Painting will be mailed to winner through postal service on Monday, February 4th, 2013. Postage will be paid by Joy Treasure.

                                                                       Psalm 25:4
Painting is mixed media paper and paint, Black and Ivory Chevron Cross with distressed background on canvas (6X6 in size).
Perfect for a desk at home or office, on a end table, or in the kitchen. Can also hang on a wall as well.
Made with lots of love, joy and prayer!
Enjoy!